Je suis enfin complet!!
2004-10-28, 8:36 p.m.

Everything is happening so fast! It feels right though. I don't feel like I'm rushing into anything. I bugged Ash and Kerry both, and they said it's not too early to literally fall in love.
Well, on Sunday we were in West Senecca for a parade and we were linging up. Just the night before Ash kept talking about Josh and how she hoped it would get less awkward between them because she really wanted to be with him. Since Joe I always said I didn't want a boyfriend for a long time because it wasn't worth it during high school. No one ever stays together and we're all too immature according to most adults. But Jeff asked me out when were getting ready to line up for the parade, and I took one look at him and everything seemed right, so I said yes. I've never been happier either! I got to march in front of him... he plays bass when he marches.
Ok, anyways, Tuesday night Ash, Josh and I went to Jeff's and we went to the Haunted Catacombs. That was so much fun! Last year Ash and I went and let our imaginations take over and were screaming and running around and running into walls... but yea this year I had my "knight in shining armor" with me so I just enjoyed having his arms around me and holding onto him tighter. That night we all watched The Ring at Jeff's, and the night couldn't have gone better! Sitting there in Jeff's arms was perfect! I didn't get to see him yesterday much though. I had a soccer sectional game and was supposed to get home by 6, so I planned to get Jeff at 6 then go see Dominic and then hang out at my house. WELL: the game ended at 5:30! The field is 45 minutes to an hour away from home, and we were also going to stop to get dinner. Basically, I'd rather starve to see Jeff than be fed and not. So i tried calling him on the bus... I heard the ring twice but then it stopped and the phone went silent. I thought I heard someone say hello but I couldnt make it out really and I just wanted to see him so bad and I was just ready to flip out. I tried calling again and it did the same thing but I could hear him and got it across to him that we were late, but knowing that he was so far away just completely made me upset. im not even sure of the reason, it seems so childish to get upset over something i have no control over. when we stopped to eat, i called him in front of subway and i could hear him much better since i wasnt on the noisy bus. hearing his voice just made me miss him that much more, but i dont think he noticed i was upset or he would have said something. he just told me there was nothing i could do about it, so i tried to just think that way. i got my food and ate and everything, but everyone took FOREVER to eat and get back on the bus. i sat on the bus with gork and a couple other people for about 20-30 minutes, and then people started to FINALLY get back on the bus. by the time this happened it was 6:30! i was frustrated. i had told jeff i hoped to be home by 7 at the latest. once the bus started moving i just felt so frustrated and helpless that i just sat there and cried my head head off. yea i know! pathetic! no one noticed though, so at least theres that. i just couldnt wait to see him! I got home by 7:30, and then waited for my dad to pick me up. Then we picked Jeff up by 8 and went over to the barn. The moment I saw him I just wanted to run into his arms and just melt..... BUT my dad was parked in the driveway right there so I just smiled at him and walked with him back to the car. Jeff met Dominic. I'm pretty sure he liked him. It was kind of awkward, but not for long. Afterwards, he came back to my house and we watched Bruce Almighty. He's so perfect and amazing and I just love him so much. People would critisize us since we've only technically been together for 5 days, but we love each other, so what other people say doesn't affect me much. I thought I loved Joe, but I was very naive then. Jeff does't have the expectations Joe did, and so finally I can just be me with him. I truly love Jeff, I wouldn't have told him that if I didn't.
Byes!
mood today: loved

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